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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Yin Yang

I phagged out on jogging yesterday. It was too hot. My shoes were still wet. I had to go do that thing. My grandmother was sick. My dog ate my homework. I must have got the am vs pm thing wrong on my alarm clock. Art DeVaney said jogging is bad. I’m gonna start tomorrow I swear. Something was stuck up my rectum…again.

It’s becoming increasing obvious that I won’t be jogging.  I’m feeling too good to jog. Honestly my joints haven’t felt this good since I’ve been 12.  Why should I go out and embark upon a dismal, dour activity that destroys hips and knees. Have you ever seen a jogger that looks like he is enjoying himself? They all have this look on their faces like they are being sodomized for the first time…against their will.

Instead I did a Yin Yoga practice presented by this Jew broad.

She’s a little skinny for Rant’s liking. Rant likes plenty of junk in the trunk. In any event it was a pretty good hip and lower back opening practice. As I thought about things last night it occurred to me that it’s all about yin and yang. I already have the yang with my OPM workout 3 days a week. Toss in a few days of yin yoga and it rounds it all out.

As you all know Rant is never hurt or sick or anything like that. I haven’t been to an ortho since college ball and don’t even remember the last time I saw a doctor. Why would I? Those professionals are for people that don’t take proper care of their bodies.  That does not apply to me. One of the main reasons I am never hurt, besides using by brain when training, is that I have always stayed close to yoga in one form or another.  As I get older I realize it’s all about mobility. All these fitness gurus that scoff at yoga are the ones that end up with hip, knee and shoulder replacements. They are the kinds of assholes I end up seeing jogging in the pool for an hour at the YMCA.

Contrary to all the bullshit around here Rant is not fat. Not even close. When I talk about weight it’s a vanity thing like wanting to get a six pack not being 20 pounds overweight. I’m good and my diet is fine. What I’m really searching for is the yin. That was my moment of enlightenment last night. I think a good 3 months of yin yang via yin yoga and OPM and I’ll be golden.

Maybe I can then start charging for access to my site and holding seminars making up preposterous stories about what cavemen ate and how they “exercised”.  The other day I heard 2 fat chicks prattling on about paleo. You know a diet has jumped the shark when fat chicks are touting it. They were also taking about Crossfit, surprise, surprise. Listen. Fuck paleo and Crossfit. I know I whine about diet a lot but I do eat well. I eat what I like when I like and basically shoot for a style of eating that my Irish grandmothers advocated. They ate food, nothing processed.  Dinner at their house would be fish, chicken or read meat on special occasions, vegetables, brown bread and butter and of course potatoes. Once in a while she’d bake a pie or something. They drank water, shit loads of tea and milk and drop or two of the pure. They lived long lives and were always the same weight. They didn’t “workout”. They didn’t own sneakers and they didn’t wear short pants.

As for Crossfit… What else is there to say? It’s still basically a program for bored trophy wives and pencil necked stock brokers willing to shell out $200 a month to do calisthenics in an old warehouse.  It’s for douchebag wannabes that didn’t have the balls to man up when they had the opportunity to play rough sports or work rough jobs.  Ten years from now Crossfit will have gone the way of nautilus, jazzercise, vibrating belt machines, obesity soap, the Thigh Master, Tae Bow, The Gazelle, cardio glide, Bowflex,  Sweatin’ to the Oldies… ad nauseam.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Lovely Day!

Great original PM workout last night. I might have to get the 48kg or do more reps or something in the bent press. The snatch with the 24kg is about right for now. It’s tough on the hands especially with the heat and the sweat. Rant of course does all his training either outdoors or in a shed. I don’t know if I would want to do this workout daily at least right now. I’m using the S&S warm up and stretches at the end of the workout. I like this workout and it’s a nice progression from the S&S. I suppose another option would be to mix S&S with the OPM. So one day OPM and then the next S&S. I’m strongly considering that .

To be honest I am not that crazy about taking up jogging but I have to give it a go. It’s shameful and pathetic to see a grown many trotting down the street in his short pants. Jogging is such an unimpressive desperation exercise that simply lacks any athletic aesthetic. Maybe I can wear a mask or run in the darkness of the night or something. I almost wish I had a treadmill. The shame of it all. Can’t I get the same benefit from doing rope and the heavy bag for a 10 round workout? Help Rant out here and I don’t want to hear a fucking thing about diet.

Anyway right is very excited about this new direction he is taking and you can’t bring him down.  I’m riding high and your suggestions of suicide and whatnot will have no bearing on me whatsoever.  Nor will I be affected by your grammar and spelling corrections. I don’t give a fuck anymore.  It’s all about being positive, thinking positive and sending out positive vibes to everyone and everything.

Monday, August 25, 2014

Original PM plus jogging.

Now that I have mastered Simple and Sinister it is time to up the ante. I currently own the 40kg doing S&S. Could I handle the 48kg? Sure, why not but right now I don’t feel like paying for a 48kg right now. In light of this I have decided to do the original program minimum which is the snatch and the bent press.

The original program minimum is the shit but it never really caught on like the second PM of man makers and TGUs on separate days for a total of 4 workouts a week. I also own this PM with the 40 kg and could easily do so if the 48kg if I had it. But as I have said many times the weight is almost irrelevant with these programs. Using just enough to provide resistance is where it’s at. I mean let’s face it 48kg is not a lot of weight for guys like Rant with a serious strength background. After awhile it just gets absurd with these 200 lbs kettlebells that look like Atlas stones. If serious strength is what you’re after get thee to the nearest set of barbells. That’s all there is to it.

Kettlebells will give you OK strength, good endurance and decent flexibility if your program is done right. I’ve always looked at kettlebells as an alternative to traditional cardio such as running. You get a big bang for the buck with kettlebells if you do it right. Most douchebags don’t do it right and give kettlebells a bad name. I’d say 90% of what I see on YouTube in terms of instruction is simply garbage. People that prey on feminine insecurities about their bodies with promises of beach bodies and whatnot are scumbags. It’s easy to make a fairly fit 20 year old look fantastic. A fat 40 year old that has popped out a few kids is a whole different ballgame.

Promises of melting fat like butter or blowtorching fat are lies. They aren’t even slight exaggerations. They are lies. Eat a pizza a day along with a few beers and lift kettlebells and you will at best look the same, maybe slightly better but not much. It’s still good for you, very good as a matter of fact. Fat and fit is still light years ahead of fat and unfit or skinny and unfit in some cases. The bottom line is moving your fat ass. Too many people fail to appreciate the medicinal power of movement due to vain and vacuous expectations. Of course since most people are dumb cunts this should come as no big surprise.

But let’s get honest here. I don’t care what other people do. I have no desire to help anyone. Nothing personal just the truth. I care about me. I’m all I ever think about. So let’s get back to what you all came here to read about. Me.

Rant is going to be focusing on the snatch and the bent press over the next few weeks. This of course this is the original PM and was dumped because most assholes found these moves too difficult. I’m not buying that bullshit. I’m almost 50, work a desk job and I’m nothing special to look at. At first glance most people would think I was younger due to my superior health and genes which I had nothing to do with. Then people might comment that I look like an ex football player or a fighter. So I look better than the average guy my age but chicks aren’t whistling at me as they drive by like the used to 30 years ago.  In other words if I can snatch and bent press anybody can with a little practice.

How I look doesn’t really matter.  Now the name of the game is mobility, flexibility and strength in that order. So I will embark on the original PM. I will be basically snatching with the 24kg DD bell and feel that for the foreseeable future that will be enough.  I will use the S&S template as my guide and do 10 sets of 10 reps. For the bent press I will use the 40kg and do 10 reps just like in S&S with the TGUs. However I don’t know if this is any everyday program like S&S. It might be but my inclination is to use it 3 days a week with another 3 days a week devoted to running. Yeah that’s right running. Fuck you. What’s so funny about a blocky guy running?

So what’s the deal with the running? I thought Rant hated jogging. Well he does…sort of but it’s the only thing he has ever done exercise wise that helps to really control the weight. I have a halfway decent out and back route through mostly bike trails along the Neponset. I’d say it’s a long 3 or short 4 mile run. I have fought it for years but the fact is that running is the most fundamental athletic activity. In order to truly be fit you need to be able to run at least a few miles at any given time so this is what I must do. I think in the long run I will be happy with this. It will be a nice mix. I don’t think that doing anything every day exclusively is very healthy although I believe one could do S&S daily but this is the exception rather than the rule.

Oh wait I almost forgot. In the interest on my goals I think it’s best to lay off the drinking and cut waaaaaay back on the weed. The beer I can take it or leave it but the bud has been turning into a daily thing after the kids go to bed. The other night I was sitting in my parlor watching TV stoned and was kind of wondering what the point was. I mean I’m sitting here alone stoned watching old Dragnet episodes.  Jack Webb is not really what one wants to see while buzzed. Well sometimes it’s funny but those hippie episodes are funny without weed.

Friday, August 22, 2014

65 days of Simple and Sinister!

Well I’ve done 65 days of nothing but Simple and Sinister. I think I took a total of 4 days off during this period. I waved the weight using the 24kg, 32kg and 40kg. Don’t have a 48kg yet so that will have to wait but I handled the 40kg no problem. I found waving very beneficial. Too much work with the 40kg made me stale and I felt kind of beat up at times so I would do the 24kg until I felt refreshed again and then back to the 32kg and then the 40 kg. I also switched back to using my DD bells. The thick handles make for a better grip workout.

My forearms are really popping and my hands feel like leather and sand paper. My back and my ass are all muscle. Still don’t have a six pack and never will unless I really dig deep and get serious about diet. For now I say fuck that shit. Stay strong and enjoy life is my motto.
Overall I have to say I really like S&S.  Is it the “perfect program”? You tell me.  For this guy it’s a big bang for the buck program which is all that I ever want. I feel more flexible and agile than I have in years going back to my Bikram’s days if you recall that. But unlike Bikram’s I am flexible and strong not flexible and flabby. Considering that my diet sucks, I smoke weed daily and drink frequently this is saying a lot.

One thing this routine has taught me is that if the exercise does not promote mobility and flexibility than I have no interest at all anymore. So bye-bye bench press and deadlift. It has also reinforced the notion that I have always held that you don’t need much to stay in great condition. Now this does not mean a 10 minute workout or some stupid shit like that. It means simple. You still have to put the time in. I don’t record time anymore or even pay it much attention but I would say the whole routine takes me about 30-40 minutes. I don’t bother with the goal of 5 minutes of swings and 10 minutes of TGUs. These are simply arbitrary numbers if you are really interested in seeing how you size up with other cats on this workout. I don’t care. I care about the movement and my pace goes by feel. Sometime I rip through it. Other times I take it slow. The same can be said for weight. I could use the 16kg and still get enormous benefits simply through the movements.

The only real negative I found was that if you didn’t do some hand exercises to counteract all the grip work then you could end up with some tendon issue. I also can’t emphasize enough how crucial the warm-ups and cool down stretches are. If I was so pressed for time I would only do the warm ups and stretches. They are that beneficial.

Last night I decided to apply the S&S structure to the original program minimum of snatches and bent presses. So I do 10 sets of 10 with the snatch and then 10 reps of bent press. The snatch I keep at 24kg and the bent press usually the 40kg. Same benefits as S&S but a different feel and certainly more complex exercises. I can see not recommending the original PM to dudes new to the game. Most guys would just get jacked up doing the original PM due to their lack of flexibility and mobility. For me I think I am going to keep going with S&S tossing in the original PM more frequently.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Ferguson Missouri.

Ferguson Missouri.  What a shit hole. At one time it was an oasis for aspiring whites looking to get away from the black trash in St Louis. Then for a time it was a place for aspiring blacks to get away from the black trash in St Louis. Now it’s a shit hole for aspiring rappers and their fellow black trash. Aspiring rappers. That’s all I needed to hear about Michael Brown, the “Gentle Giant” that robbed a convenient store for a box of Swisher Sweets just prior to being gunned down.  I had to do a double take on the Swisher Sweets. Really? Swisher fucking Sweets? This is so Ghetto Fab you couldn’t even make this shit up. I bet he also grabbed a gallon of blue drink and a monster bag of Cheetos.

The whole story is beyond pathetic. Brown was obviously a piece of shit and the type of character that I have contended with a thousand times back in my previous life in Cleveland. Just another small time punk looking to drag the rest of the world down to the level of his pathetic life. He was part and parcel of any member of the black trash class.  Now he’s just another dead ass punk and once again the black trash and their professional agitators are rallying around another criminal as evidence that they are being discriminated against, oppressed and hassled by the police. Another poor choice that goes back to Rodney King.

The media as usual is using their tired and played out 1968 template of big bad whitey coming down on blackie whose just minding his own business.  They are once again trying to portray the criminal as some sort of innocent bystander that just happened to get in the way of some racist cop with blood lust.  They are looking at everything but what happened.  The problem as they see it is that white cops are overrepresented on the police force in a predominately black town. In their eyes this is Bull Conner in Montgomery taking the dogs and fire hoses to black women and children in order to “keep the niggers in their place”.  Of course this is what sells and require the least amount of thought and it only helps to flame the fires of a class of people that aren’t known for their ability to reason and resolve conflicts. So we are left with rioting and anarchy.

The people acting up are a desperate and frustrated lot. They are not this way because of cops or whites or any other scapegoat that they have been led to believe is the cause of their problems. They are frustrated because they are losers. They just can’t seem to succeed in this life as they watch everyone else around them succeed, even members of their own race who they castigate as uncle toms or acting white or some other such nonsense.  It’s like watching a primate try to open up a child proof bottle. They either give up or they start destroying the bottle in frustration of not being able to open it.

It’s always a lot easier to blame someone or something else for your problems then to take responsibility for your actions.  I can’t help it I’m an alcoholic or a drug addict. It’s not my fault. Daddy didn’t take me to enough ball games when I was a kid. It’s not my fault whitey keeps me down. Pathetic but it’s endemic to a whole class of people of multiple races in this country that just either don’t give a fuck or they just don’t get it. But how can you not get it? From any early age most of us are told to stay out of trouble, do well in school and to follow the Golden Rule.  It’s not all that complicated for most of us regardless of what are background were. I came from a “broken home” as they used to call it. The old man was a violent drunk and the neighborhood was a shit hole. I bounced from couch to couch with my mother as people would take us in here and there. I certainly wasn’t the perfect kid but I understood that there were two roads I could take. I guess I chose the right one.  I mean how hard is it not to be a criminal?

I see the frustration of the black trash in Ferguson and some of their gripes are legitimate. Our police departments are out of control especially when dealing with those that don’t have shit. They trample all over their rights because most of them are too dumb to know when their rights are being trampled over. But at the same time why is it that they can’t see the role they play? How can a person be so unaware that you can’t go through life without an education, without a job and acting like some sort of self caricature in a fucking rap video? How can these people be so delusional that they can’t see that you can’t go around robbing corner stores and charging police officers without severe consequences? Aren’t they the ones jumping around hooting and hollering in church? Do they not read the bible they profess to believe in? Did they miss the advice to always avoid the appearance of evil or that those that live by the sword die by the sword?

In what bizzaro world can you expect success when you speak incomprehensible English, you revel in ignorance and urban myth and you are sullen and disagreeable at every opportunity? Where in this sort of behavior is there reason for others to give you respect?  Under what conditions have you earned the right to be respected? Rodney King was a punk. Trayvon Martin was a punk. Martin Brown was a punk. The lesson here should be that being a punk, a criminal and hostile to the police will get you into all sorts of jams including loss of your life. This is reality not a fucking movie. These people were not civil rights heroes to rally around and to use as an excuse to loot, create havoc and inflict violence on others. These people are only hurting themselves with the looting and destruction and they can’t even see it. It doesn’t affect my life one iota and if anything it makes me less sympathetic to these people and more inclined to side with the cops even before I know all the facts.  Hell the only ones benefiting from this are the cops who are pulling in shit loads of overtime.

But to be fair this is not completely a lopsided issue.  Since 9-11 we have become a quasi police state. We are expected to put up with all sort of intrusions into our personal lives with blatant violations of our civil liberties. We are being spied on. We are being compelled to purchase insurance products from the private sector. We can’t express ourselves or protest without being met by the paramilitary resistance of the state. Our police officers are still too prone to shoot citizens when other non lethal methods could be deployed and the caliber of people we recruit for these law enforcement position are not exactly the cream of the crop if you know what I mean. There is also not enough transparency as to what the government is doing. The police should have been able to address this issue quickly and openly. Instead they remained shrouded and took their usual arrogant position that they don’t work for the public which in fact is true. They work for the oligarchy. And the oligarchy has no interest in the poor other than how to keep them contained and complacent. If this were New York or Washington DC this incident wouldn’t have made it a day before martial law was declared because there is big business to be conducted in these cities. Who gives a fuck about Ferguson?  Who even heard of it before this?  This issue doesn’t really affect the oligarchs directly so they aren’t that pressed about it. However it looks bad and it might give others the idea that they can act up in places that matter to the elites.

My prediction is that the cop that shot the punk will be the fall guy. Someone, somewhere will come up with some bullshit about the guy saying “nigger” back in 1987 or some bullshit. Lots of placation will occur. Heads will roll at the lower levels of government and then the issue will fad into the background like Trayvon Martin until some other knuckle head gets killed. We never learn anything in this nation. Never.